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I will never understand people who think Tinkerbell is cute and girly and innocent like
Have you ever seen Peter Pan
She tries to MURDER WENDY
also she’s a jealous monster
why is all her merchandise flowery and completely opposite to her personality
and in the original book she “swears like a sailor”
ladies. be careful when u wear spaghetti straps. it might distract the boys. they’ll start thinking of spaghetti. they will get hungry. they will stop at nothing to get their spaghetti.
As a boy I can confirm that when I see spaghetti straps my hunger knows no bounds
- Les Miserables:
- Stealing a loaf of bread may seem like a good idea, but it will literally fuck up your entire life.
- Spring Awakening:
- If you get laid, you die. If you don't get laid, you die. Also don't trust your parents.
- It's ok to murder people as long as you wear lingerie and can sing and dance.
- The King and I:
- Racism doesn't count if you sing about it.
- My Fair Lady: People will like you if you talk like you have a broom stick up your ass.
- Hairspray: In the 60s, people will hate you if you're overweight, UNLESS you also hang out with black people.
- AIDS really blows.
- A Chorus Line:
- If you ever audition for a musical chorus, you better have a goddamn good story as to why you became a dancer.
- If your boyfriend doesn't like you, change absolutely everything about yourself to please him.
- The Phantom of the Opera:
- When choosing between a controlling boyfriend and a sociopath composer with a messed up face who dwells in an opera house's basement, take your sweet damn time.
- Rocky Horror Picture Show:
- Finding refuge from a storm in a mansion who's owner is a transvestite will make you inexplicably horny, and seemingly bisexual.